To be OK!

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 "Learn to be OK with not being invited, included, or considered."


For the last few weeks, I had restless nights.  Like I have a full day, working out, cooking, cleaning, taking care of my kids and husband's schedule, even my own writing assignments. Normally, after a full working day, you are tired, and you definitely should fall asleep even before your head touches your pillow. But somehow, sleep eludes me. The reason is not complicated. I think, I mean everyone thinks but my brain is a factory or a sub shop that is open 24/7. It just never stops.  

There are so many things running through my head and sometimes it is hard to take a break. Constantly thinking about "Why did this happen?" and "How am I supposed to accept and move on?"

Hey, don't worry guys, I am not talking about some tragedy or life-altering event. It is simply that out of hundreds of people I have encountered in my journey (of life) some are not happy with me. Not happy is putting it mildly. I am used to being in everyone's good books always, or you could say I am always used to being the "centre-of-good-attention". Don't get me wrong I have faced rejection before many times in my life but I have not faced hatred. Especially when that hatred is to me. I mean my existence becomes a problem for someone else and they delete me from the equation like I don't matter. I become "zero" or "null" or "void" just like that in a split second.  Result of that, sleepless nights, self-doubt and existential crisis. 

Yes, I know I am overdramatic. But that's why I am writing this to get myself sorted 😇. 

So coming back to my sleepless night, I finally give up trying to sleep, I get up and do "Pranayama" and relax a little, but that bubble in my head keeps going back to unsorted thoughts again. To distract myself I do the most natural thing to me, open my phone and browse through social media. and the first thing I see is this quote,  "Learn to be OK with not being invited, included, or considered."   And just like that it sinks in. 

Guys, I know it is cheesy to say but really you don't need anyone's else to approve of you. You be "You". You be the version of yourself that you like. You be the center of attention for yourself. 

P.S: I might still have sleepless nights, but at least now I am beginning to accept this version of "me" and I am loving it. Blessed be my peeps. Be happy, Be YOU. 










Comments

  1. MansiMarch 8, 2021 at 8:35 AM

    Very well penned...l would like to add on learn to be ok..and learn to say "NO".

    ReplyDelete

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